Thank You

I got a few responses to my post, which, in turn, was a response, to the Ultimate Goth Guide's post about prejudice, and I just wanted to say thanks.

Tabby's own response deeply saddened me, but in a way, just made me more determined to reiterate my point: the more you speak out, the better it will get. Do not take my mistakes (in many things) and stay quiet. My friends will often say, "Kitty, you were never quiet about this kind of thing, you've literally screamed at the top of your lungs about it" and, yes, that's true. I am also deathly cynical of the schools' handling (in my case, in Amy's, in everyone who is like us or, in fact, just picked on), and my mistake, I think, was my lack of discretion. I was a freak. I am a freak. My standing up for myself seemed to make things worse. I did try it "the other way" quite a few times, going straight to the principal and so forth. There were a few teachers on my side (Deirdre at Shearwater, for example, and Mrs. Panucci, Ms. Fathers, Mrs. Wellington, Mr. Dawson, Mr. Richardson and Mrs. Raitelli at Nowra to name a few - and while that seems like a lot, I need to mention that Nowra is a big fucking school. About 2000 students now), but none of them could do much for me.

If things get the way they did for myself and Tabby, go to either the police or the school liason officer. I am not exaggerating. I remember they sent me to the school councellor because I was being bullied. How does this make any sense at all? "She's being bullied, and it must be something to do with her, not the kids who try to cut her hair?"

I did neglect to mention in my previous post about self-harm. Now, I definitely did it - however, I couldn't tell you when, where or with what. While under these psychotic fits of depression (I literally cannot remember so much of highschool), I did a lot of things I'm not proud of. I need to say this - if you ever feel the temptation to harm yourself, or have in the past, talk to somebody. You will not regret it, because even if you got stuck with condescending and irritating psychologists, at least you'll have someone to yell at. (I had one who asked me, "what do you want to talk about next week?" I stared at her, agape, for several moments, before saying, "Madame, what do you suppose you would do if a pack of utahraptors went wandering down the main street?" "I...I don't know..." "Because it has not happened yet?" "Y-yes, I suppose..." "Then why are you asking me to tell you what I wish to discuss when the possibilities have not happened yet?" Needless to say, I did not return, but I did feel better. +10 points for every time you can slip "jesus on a utahraptor" into a conversation with them.)

Again, I urge everyone to tell their stories and let me know, so I can read them. There is literally no end I will not go to to end this kind of discrimination, in schools and otherwise (but especially in school - because I cannot return, ever, I am deemed worthless by society - because of being bullied).

Talk, and we can pull attention to this issue. Tell, and someone, somewhere, will listen.

Because if we're freaks, why would we want to be anything else?