Saturday 26 November 2011

I Hate Attention Whores - Rageful 200th Post

This may sound hypocritical coming from a blogger (what with a blog being the socially acceptable form of masturbation), but I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about using depression to get sympathy, and it seems only fitting that my 200th post on this blog is a rage post, with some Harry Potter jokes in.

So here's the particular incident that is fulling my anger at this. I'm not just "raeg". I am legitimately furious about this twisted thing. Ctrl+click on them to view separately them if they distend your screen or just sort of "what" at you.
for some reason my name-editing did not work on the last guy.
let's ignore that.


Seriously, by about here I have no fucking clue what is happening.

Now, here's the thing - Channy is my age. She's 16/17. Clearly, the world WILL END if someone does not like her. My responses were big-ish, so I will simply quote them here.

"So you posted a status pretending you were dead and then going BUT WAIT is fucking stupid and sort of, you know, sick. If you're going through a "tough time with friends", realise what is causing it and then either stop what you are doing or, and here's the tricky part, realise those people are cunts anyway and move the fuck on with your life. Like a reasonable young adult."
"Here's the thing, sunshine - one of my best friends killed herself this year, and none of us knew until after her funeral had taken place, and to this day we do not know why, or what even happened. The fact you are using suicide as a way to say "I have a desperate need for attention that cannot be filled through legitimate means" is sick, and you are an idiot and a twisted fucker if you think that's okay. Your world is not going to end because of "friend issues" in *highschool* for christ's sake.

You are desperate for validation, and so you post about this kind of shit. "Like if you care about me"? Really? Do you know what really drives people away? Desperation.

And now a helpful interlude from Heather, a girl younger than you with actual legit mental illness, who has made attempts on her own life due to the severity of her illness. "That's fucking stupid and you should tell her she's an insensitive idiot who should be deserted by everyone for taking emotional advantage of people who are supposed to be her friends.""

If you are having a problem - an actual, real problem - this is exactly what you do not do. You need to get help, not post bullshit on social networking sites - especially where your parents can see. (I want to point out this is probably why Channy has not responded - she has been found out by her kind-of-an-arse-but-well-meaning-father and quite-lovely-but-needs-a-spine mother) It's a terrible idea, and you can't expect things to get better when you are actively doing things to ruin them.

After Chinchilla took her own life, I felt like I had lost a part of myself. She was one of my best friends on the planet, and a bigger influence on me than you can ever imagine. The fact that this girl is using suicide to gain sympathy for her upper-middle-class white girl problems makes me so angry that I feel sick. She decides it's acceptable to draw attention to herself like this, saying she's SOOO ALOOOONE and begging for people's attention while her family have enough food and money for the rest of their suburb to live on for weeks. She has two expensive laptops, a flat screen TV in her room bigger than the one in our lounge room, a PS3, an iPhone, an Xbox, three-hundred-dollar collectable dolls, and no worries for her future, and yet she threatens suicide because of highschool friend problems.

When I was younger, I had some very severe mental problems. I had severe and psychotic depression, post-traumatic stress, was a victim of horrible bullying, and my aspergers was undiagnosed. I pulled some of this shit myself (we all do at some point), but less "lyk dis status if u car abut me" and more "Something is very wrong. Can someone please, please help me?" and people did. Once my trauma began to die down, I found it a lot easier to get on with shit and do what needed doing. No, I'm not perfect, and there are things I do wrong, but I don't beg for attention like an abandoned spaniel because my group of friends at school were sort of dicks.

If you have a problem, fix it. Otherwise, don't complain when things turn to shit.

Much love.
(ps: creating the Filthy Victorians LJ tonight. will facebook, twitter and blog the link when it is done) 


Louise said...

I'm from the other side of the world to you, but I've seen one or two variations of these on my facebook too. When I last came across one, I read the first line, where it says "R.I.P (name)", and automatically felt shocked. This was terrible, what the hell had happened!

And then- whoops, silly me, she's not really dead, it's just a copypaste status.

That did piss me off. Chances are I wasn't the only one who had, for a second, thought it was real, and if I, someone who's not very close to this person, had been gearing up to feel stunned and saddened... what about those people who considered themselves ber best friends? Or were her family?

It's annoying, because while I'm not close to this person, I do know her well enough to know that she wouldn't have been trying to scare people, or trivialise the experiences of anyone who'd actually lost a friend or relative. She probably just wasn't thinking. Decided to post it without stopping to realise just how idiotic it is.

I'm yet to come across one that's specified suicide, though, which is no bad thing. Pretending you're suicidal when you're not just to get some attention/reassurance over a minor worry is a painfully moronic thing to do, for all the reasons you mentioned and others.

Niamh said...

Thats awful!! a family member of my died that way earlier I understand what its actually like to lose someone. I HATE when people joke about it. I think these people need to wake up and realise its not funny. They are toying with people's emotion.

Tenebris In Lux said...

@Louise: Same thing. I thought that they were actually telling the truth until I figured out what it was -_-

I hate those statuses too. You covered this topic perfectly. I especially love the "If you have a problem, fix it. Otherwise, don't complain when things turn to shit" wisdom.

Yeah, I hate that people bitch about little problems when there are worse things and situations out there. I know I'm still dealing with personal demons, but I don't whine or cry about it (though it is rather unhealthy that I've held this inside of my head for awhile ..)

But one of the more annoying things I've seen is "leik dis if u thnk im pretty." Really? And also, one of the clique-y girls I got to school with had on her profile page said that "I dont get in2 drama unles i need 2." (Yeah, I'm a stalker). That was quite laughable considering she is always chasing drama.

High Arka said...

How sad. Would you have preferred she actually killed herself, or that she tried to indicate in a different way to her fellow humans that something was wrong?

Kitty Lovett; The Unadulterated Cat said...

Louise - It does sort of trivialise everything. It's sick, and nothing more.

Smashed Doll - I am truly sorry to hear that (although there's no way to say that without sounding like an insincere git)and there's a difference between joking about it (which can be acceptable, depending on situation and audience. I'm talking about comedians, which is a different thing alltogether) and what she is doing - begging for attention using suicide.

Stairs - they're just terribad.

Tenebris - thanks. It's not that they're bitching about problems - that's okay. It's okay to say "I'm not happy right now" or "Today has been shit" or something similar - you can't trivialise someone else's issues because there are worse things. Expecting attention for your over-dramatic behaviour is different, and what the problem is. The point of facebook is to tell people what you're up to, and it's okay to inform people that right now you feel shitty. But every damn status begging for attention is wrong in all forms.

I think you're pretty. :'3 But I get what you mean. I'm a bit of a dramuwhore myself - when I'm in the mood I love to rev people up and get them angry over their own stupidity. I don't deny doing it, either (and I don't deny being a huuuge FB stalker)

Arka - To be honest, I'd rather she just suck it the fuck up. My life isn't perfect, and yes, I vent about it online, but I don't beg for attention for being omgz deprssd!@!!!~!

Further update: Her brother Jake threatened me and called me a freak, hilariously enough he tries his hardest to look like a complete fag (I don't mean gay person. I mean stereotypical definition of a complete and utter faggot). Channy also told me to "grow up". THE IRONING.

Does she seem to realise she is an immature cuntbag? She also claimed she has been diagnosed with "severe depression" and is going to "councilling". You don't go to councilling for severe depression. You get put on medication and sent to psychotherapy. I also doubt she is seeing a proper therapist. The school chaplain at her school (they don't have a councillor. they have a priest. what the actual fuck? he's a cunt, too) does not count.

Finally, suck it up, princess. You are in highschool, it will pass faster than you can imagine. If you are really depressed, you don't post about it online for attention. People with severe depression hide it. It's sort of a symptom.

High Arka said...

When you feel like venting, someone looking for attention, help, and wise advice seems like the perfect partner. If you've reached a higher stage of understanding than she has, perhaps you could help her get there. If she's making it all up, perhaps you could help her understand why it's not a kind joke.

Willingness to talk and listen--rather than to scream and ignore--is a rare thing in the great echo chamber of the modern everdeath states. Someone actually trying to express something is a delightful reminder of humanity.

Amy Asphodel said...

Oh my god, I wasn't aware how Chinchilla died... I am so, so sorry to hear that.

On-topic, this girl needs a bitchslap.

Kitty Lovett; The Unadulterated Cat said...

Amy, it's what we've heard, but it's not completely concrete. However, it fits. Worst part was she messaged me the day I figure it happened, answering a question I had asked her and then saying she "had to go". I missed her being online by five seconds. I've been meaning to make a big post about it, but I haven't found myself able.

Yes, she does, and yet people are still defending her actions. What?!

Snowhyte said...

I have also seen these on Facebook and I agree that it is a horrible attention-seeking ploy. It truly saddens me that people would post those statuses...
I have seen friends of mine deal with the death of loved ones through suicides...I have no respect for anyone who would think it is something to be taken lightly like that.


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